


Common Soul

by Tarlan



Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: Angst, Community: fanfic100, M/M, Unresolved Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-10-29
Updated: 2006-10-29
Packaged: 2017-10-21 04:08:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,011
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/220740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tarlan/pseuds/Tarlan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack had never expected to see a mirror image of him and Daniel reflected back in the form of Sheppard and McKay.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Common Soul

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Fanfic100 078. When?

When Jack first met Daniel he thought the archaeologist was a nerd. Worse, he was one of those lily-livered nerds that whined and sneezed, and went off with strangers on strange worlds without thinking twice. Here was someone who did not seem to understand the concept of taking orders except when applied to some hocus pocus religion. In short, Daniel Jackson was a major liability who was foisted upon Jack on that first mission to Abydos.

Jack was never certain when all that changed but, by the time he had lost Daniel to radiation sickness, even knowing Daniel had ascended did little to alleviate the terrible sense of loss.

Years later he realized that this was when he had started to distance himself from SG-1 and from Daniel in particular, finally accepting a promotion that, eventually, would draw him even further away, beyond the SGC to the heart of the Pentagon.

Looking back, Jack wondered when he had turned from intergalactic space hero to a goddamn coward.

By the time he recognized his mistake he was already seated behind a desk, first at the SGC and then in Washington heading up Homeworld Security. By then, the Pentagon had sunk its claws in deep enough to keep him there. So he used his position to refuse Daniel permission to leave with the Atlantis expedition, fully aware that his decision held elements of cowardice. He had been unwilling to risk losing Daniel on a one way ticket to the Pegasus galaxy when the Milky Way held enough danger to keep them all up at night.

The reasoning he gave might have been grounded in strategic significance, knowing Daniel's years of fighting the Goa'uld and his innate abilities were needed to protect Earth but Jack knew his own motivations were far less altruistic. Selfishly, he had wanted Daniel where he knew from one day to the next that he still lived and breathed, and sneezed and rambled incoherently about lost civilizations and other stuff that went right over Jack's head. Rationally, he knew that every step through the Stargate held the same risk but every gate in the Milky Way was close enough to Earth for Jack to beg assistance from the Jaffa or the Asgard. Hell, he could even order the Odyssey or the Daedalus to the rescue now.

Atlantis was a step into the abyss and Jack could not bear the not-knowing. Not knowing if Daniel was alive or dead, if he was happy or miserable, if he had found his lifelong dream or lost everything.

Only now could Jack admit that he would hand over whole worlds to save this one special person--Daniel--if it would make a difference but he knew it wouldn't...couldn't...because, by doing so, he would destroy everything he held dear; his love for Daniel and, more importantly, Daniel's love for him.

He would still give everything he owned if Daniel simply asked, but not Atlantis. Not that step into the void that could be forever.

What Jack had never expected to see was the mirror image of him and Daniel reflected back in the form of John Sheppard and Rodney McKay.

At this moment, the how and why of McKay's death and resurrection was immaterial. What concerned Jack was the virtual wall building around Sheppard's heart as he tried to defend against any future pain.

"Been there, done it, got the damn t-shirt to prove it." Jack indicated towards the two stars on his collar denoting his rank. "It wasn't worth it."

"And this is?" Sheppard raised both eyebrows sardonically, uncaring that this was not the way to speak to a superior officer.

"No." Jack paused for a heartbeat, knowing he was about to break a few regulations, DADT in particular. "But he is...to you."

The color drained from Sheppard's face and Jack raised a hand to forestall the denial waiting to spill from Sheppard's lips.

"He's worth it," Jack reiterated. "Every day you can get, every hour, minute, hell every damn second you can grab hold of is...he's worth it."

Jack watched as Sheppard's righteous indignation deflated, replaced by bitterness that Jack knew all too well.

"Permission to speak candidly." Jack nodded and Sheppard continued. "How would you know?"

His own regrets filled him as he looked away; already uncomfortable with the conversation as he was not one to bare his soul to anyone, let alone a junior officer under his chain of command.

"Daniel," he said softly.

When Jack looked up, Sheppard was watching him intently, eyes no longer holding bitter regrets but filled with realization and sadness instead. Sheppard looked away, Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed hard, and then his expression froze. Jack followed Sheppard's eyes and saw Daniel heading towards them, his face buried in a datapad. By his side, Rodney was waving his hands and talking fast, so different in discipline and yet both fired with the same passion for their work. Jack saw the moment Rodney spotted them, the momentary pause in the stream of geek-talk, the tiniest quirk of lips aimed solely at Sheppard that revealed more than the brightest lust-filled grin.

"He's worth it," Jack stated again and felt Sheppard relax beside him. As Jack began to turn away, he felt Sheppard's hand on his arm. Sheppard's eyes no longer held the hard conviction of moments before, the wall crumbling. Instead he seemed calmer, offering a gentle half-smile as if finally recognizing a common soul in Jack.

"He's worth it too," Sheppard stated softly, intently, before dropping his hand and walking towards rather than away from McKay. He watched for a moment, smiling wryly as McKay's bright blue eyes sparkled in a welcome tinged with relief now that Sheppard was no longer avoiding him.

When Jack looked at Daniel, expecting his scientist to be caught up in greeting Sheppard, he caught the softest glimmer of a wishful smile aimed only at him. Perhaps it wasn't too late for him either, not when Daniel still had that special smile just for him.

THE END


End file.
